Bad Decision

While I was dating TAM, I made a lot of bad decisions.

The worst decision is why this blog was created.

But there were several bad decisions leading up to them.


The last few day I have been having a spring clean of sorts.

As I went through my closet I found clothes I bought just to make TAM like me more. There were low cut shirts, tight shirts, teeny tiny shorts, mini skirts, well you get the picture.

I had a hard time throwing them out, but I realized it was a final step in my spring clean.
I knew I wasn't going to wear them ever again, but I really didn't want to throw them out. It was hard for me. I guess it was the money I spent on them. Or maybe, it was the idea of why I bought them, having someone to love, someone who loved me.

But I'm really glad I got rid of them. I'm not going to miss them. I haven't worn them in a while, and I never really liked wearing them.

I realized I needed to throw them out. Hanging onto clothes I was never going to wear was just another reminder of my bad decisions I had made for a few years.

So I'm throwing out my bad decisions.

Baby Step #4

I recieved my temple reccommend.

It is the most wonderful feeling in the whole world.

As I am not endowed, nor do I plan on being endowed in the nearing future, I just have a baptismal reccommend, but still, the feeling is the sweetest above all.

I know what I have been through is nothing, because I made a decision and I stuck to it.

I have now completed another one of my goals for the year.

I am attending church regularly.
I am partaking of the sacrament.
I obtained a temple reccommend!

Scriptures

The Relief Society message this month was on scripture study.

We were urged as women and daughters of God to become masters of the scriptures, to strengthen our homes and families. And promised, that as we read our scriptures, our lives would be blessed.

I was extremely grateful for this message.

I have noticed this in my life, about scripture study. When I read my scriptures daily, my life is blessed. I think of TAM less, and life is easier to move through.

I've also noticed when I don't, my body is tired, weak, and so is my spirit and soul. I begin doubting my decision to cut off all communication with TAM and I become discouraged.

I am so much better to get along with on days that I have read my scriptures. I have strived to do better, and I have. But now I need to do even better. I let myself skip a few days here and there, and I don't make sure that reading is a priority, which is completely stupid.

I need to do better, to make my scripture study more of a priority, and I know that my Heavenly Father will bless me, and will make carrying my load a little easier.